(Trust me when I tell you that putting your new dating plan in print gives it weight and meaning in a way that simply thinking about it does not.) So, do you have your pen and paper or your favorite digital device? Obvious questions that you should probably ask yourself before writing this list of goals include the following: After asking yourself these and similar questions, you can probably formulate a short list of goals and/or important traits that you are seeking in another person and a relationship.Obviously, every person has specific wants and needs, so everyone’s list of goals looks different. Suggested questions for guiding a discussion are included. option=com_content&task=view&id=219&Itemid=129 Source: ETR RECAPP Website Target Audience: Level IV (adolescence, ages 15-18; high school) Topic: Romantic Relationships and Dating Duration of Lesson: 1 hour 20 minutes (Part I, 30 minutes; Part II, 50 minutes) Date Published: 2002 Summary: This learning activity is designed to help youth understand the risks of unprotected sex and learn about contraceptive options.
Or maybe you’ve decided to address your long-standing dating dilemma with a bold new approach. What You Want (And Don’t Want): Part One of Your Plan If you’ve been actively dating (going out at least once or twice per month on a consistent basis) without success, and you’ve been doing this for an extended period of time (a year or more), and you’re tired of watching everyone else fall in love and get married and have kids and move to a nice house in the suburbs, it might be time for a dating plan that doesn’t consist entirely of “hooking up with that hot new guy/gal in accounting.” I suggest that you start by getting out your best pen and a piece of paper—or your laptop if that’s your preference—because you’re going to be writing some things down. The first thing you need to do is create a list of goals for future dating.A client of mine recently wrote out the following list, and, in doing so, he outlined a serious departure from his lengthy (unsuccessful) dating history: Usually it is a very good idea to review your list of goals for dating with a trusted friend, family member, therapist or spiritual advisor, asking for feedback to make sure the list is truthful, realistic and complete.In other words, objective feedback from people who care about you can be both enlightening and helpful.There is no way to avoid taking emotional risks when dating.Give yourself support, and seek out support from others as you do this. Get extra help (counseling) if you need it as you would for any other important area in your life. The tips above are provided to give you a general structure and guidelines to follow in dating.Counseling can offer you much needed support as you go through the dating process and can also, in some cases help you speed up the process of meeting new people.